Smile-breaks
VISA Knows More About Me Than I Do
Sheesh! VISA has my whole life story! VISA knows me better than I do. I still can’t remember all of my VISA number. What VISA knows about me is enough to fill a computer.
And every time I step out of line, VISA calls. The first time I had just walked in the door and the phone was beeping away. You know what that means – someone’s called and the beeping’s not gonna stop until you get over there and listen to your messages. So I did.
I pressed the message button and an electronic voice – kind of a nice one - told me I’d better call 1-800-567-8243 immediately regarding my VISA.
I called. The VISA representative didn’t waste any time. “Do you know where your VISA card is right now?”
Gosh! I don’t know. I think it’s in my wallet with the kids. Oh – never mind. ’Nother story. I asked VISA if I should go check. He said definitely.
Whew! It was there.
“Good. I’m going to list five recent charges to your VISA. Tell me if you made any of these charges.”
Uh-oh. I wasn’t planning to tell anyone - ever - how much I spent at Macy’s. Before he could read the first charge, I ’fessed up. “Yeah, that was me. I spent $XXX at Macy’s today.” (I’m not telling you, either. Sorry.)
The other charges were easy. I confirmed them all, the VISA guy hung up, the sun came out and daisies bloomed and best of all, my VISA was still alive and kicking. The VISA guy’s called me lots of times since and I always appreciate that he’s looking out for me, but the last time he called was different. It wasn’t him.
The guy in the other room left that morning for a drive to Northern California. I stayed home. About two in the afternoon I charged gas. About two in the afternoon, he charged gas. VISA called.
But this VISA wasn’t someone you could talk to, ask questions or shoot the breeze with. This VISA only told you what button to push.
“If you have your VISA card in your possession, press one,” the electronic voice instructed. How do you tell a computer you need to go look? Somehow I didn’t think it would wait while I went into the other room and dug through my wallet, so I pressed one.
“I’m going to read three recent charges to your VISA,” it continued. “If you made the charge, press 1. If you’re not sure if you made the charge, press 2. If you didn’t make the charge, press 3.”
I poised my finger and waited. The first charge was for one dollar at a gas station in Palmdale. One dollar?!
If it had been thirty bucks, I would’ve confirmed. The guy from the other room prob’ly stopped for gas somewhere around there. But a dollar’s worth? I pressed 2 for “not sure” and waited for the next charge.
“Thank you. Your VISA’s canceled.”
WHAT?!!! I didn’t say to cancel my card. Wait! I just said I wasn’t sure. Now my guy’s driving around the state with a no-good credit card and he’s not gonna be happy. All I could think of was, where’s the “go-back” button? Darn phones. They ought’ a have one of those.
“If you want to reverse this cancellation, you’ll have to call your local credit union representative.” And without another word, VISA hung up on me.
Fortunately the local credit union rep was human. After she explained the one dollar charge - it’s done automatically as a credit check when you use your card at a new gas station - she re-activated my VISA so quick my guy never know it got canceled.
Boy, I haf’ta say it’s a lot easier talking to a human - as long as she doesn’t push your buttons.