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How's your cold doing?

     I never get sick. Hah! That's what I always say when someone tells me they got the flu last week or they got a cold last month and it's still hanging on. I speak up so righteously, "I never get sick. Don't have time for it," or "I don't believe in getting sick; positive thinking, you know."

     Wait a minute while I go grab a Kleenex… Okay. Thanks for waiting. Oops! Excuse me; didn't mean to cough so loudly. I'll be okay – just need a drink of water and a cough drop. I'm almost over it. I don't think it's in the contagious stage any more.

     Funny. The past couple of months I've been hearing an awful lot of people saying exactly the same thing I always say: "I never get sick." They're saying it with a slightly hoarse voice as they reach for the wad of Kleenex in their pockets. Then they ‘fess up, "But this time I got that cold that's been going around."

     I sat with my dad through his pneumonia. I had breakfast with my niece with her everlasting cold; I went out in public without fear of catching a cold. For months I never got sick. But then I did.

     I knew I was doomed when I woke up with that familiar razor-blade feeling in my throat. Wait - familiar? I never get sick! How come I said "familiar?" Good long-term memory, I guess. Unless maybe it hasn't been that long…?

     I was okay the first day. The razor blades backed off during the day and I went about my usual stuff, blowing my nose a bit and sounding a little hoarse and if anyone asked, I told them I never get sick but looks like I caught this cold that's going around. Not to worry; I planned to lick it in three days. None of this two weeks, three weeks – eight weeks! for me. A friend told me it lasted eight weeks for her. I was going to whip this thing into shape in a couple of days and be good as gold… Well, good as I was pre-cold.

     The second day wasn't so good. Neither was the third day. It's now the eleventh day. The throat's been okay for about a week; the coughing is minimal but still there; the nose-blowing is continual throughout the day; the headaches are gone – knock on wood. Thankfully, the nose-blowing takes a time-out while I'm sleeping.

     I figured since I'm retired I could fight this thing off pretty quick. Lots of rest, extra sleep, no need to run off to the office and run reports. This worked pretty well except for the timetables: mine was three days; the cold's was for a much longer visit.

     Darn colds! I stayed away from public places so as not to share my wonderful encounter with friends and foes the first week. I'm over it enough to be out and about now, but the cold seems to be attached to me. Won't leave. I attacked it with aspirin the first few days and did lots of nothing and every day I felt better. Not much, but better. I was s'posed to be a third over it the second day; I was maybe one-hundredth over it. Next day was the same – another tiny bit less of the headache, cough and stuffy nose – and the next days continued at the same slow pace.

     I love when someone asks me, "How is your cold?" I get to tell them my cold's doing great! Thriving, in fact! Me? Not so well, thank you. That's when they say, "I never get sick."

     I advise you to avoid saying that. This cold has it out for you. It will find you.

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