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The Elevator Doors Kept Opening

     I pressed the elevator button – harder this time - and waited for the doors to close, but just like last time, they didn’t. I reached down and pressed the “Close Door” button.

     Hurry! Hurry! I need to get back before the speaker begins. I’d run up to my room for a jacket between dinner and dessert because the banquet room was cold as ice. Well, I didn’t run actually. I scurried to the elevator, punched the button and rode slowly, smoothly up to the twelfth floor. No problem. Elevator worked perfectly. Slow, but perfect.

     In my room I couldn’t find my jacket anywhere. I dumped practically everything out of my suitcase and still no jacket. I figured I must’ve left it in the car, so I rushed back to the elevator and now I was going to be late and this darn elevator absolutely wouldn’t go anywhere.

     “Ping!” the elevator doors opened. I started to get out, but we hadn’t gone anywhere. This was getting old. For the third time, I pressed the “Close Door” button and the lovely golden doors slid shut with their little metallic “ping.” Hoping I’d make it on time after all, I pressed the twelve button and waited for the elevator to go down.

     “Ping!” The elevator doors slid open and held their stance. I looked out at the twelfth floor for the fourth time.

     Darn it! I pressed the button again. Nothing happened. I pressed the “Close Door” button. The doors closed. I pressed the twelve button again and prayed that this time we would go down. I really wanted to hear that speaker and I really didn’t want to walk in just as she was sitting down to thunderous applause. Plus I hoped my dessert would still be there.

     “Ping!” The doors opened.

     Jiminy! Why won’t this elevator budge? Well, I know when to give up. I’ll get out and take the other elevator. I thought about taking the stairs. I could sure use the exercise – and I can do stairs really fast.

     But I had no idea where the staircase was and from the twelfth floor to the second floor is a long way, even if it is all downhill. I did a quick calculation and decided it would be faster to get out and use the other elevator. I got off the elevator and pressed the down button between the two elevators.

     It occurred to me that maybe I’d pressed the “up” button instead of the “down” button before and maybe that was what had confused the elevator’s electronic brain. You never know what technology will do these days.

     The elevator doors opened. The wrong elevator doors. That’s the elevator I just got off. I want the other one. I waited until the doors closed and then I pressed the outside button again.

     “Ping!” The doors opened. Same wrong elevator.

     Oh, dummy! This elevator’s here. The other elevator’s not coming when there’s one already here.

     I stepped into the elevator that wouldn’t go anywhere and waited for the doors to close. Maybe I’d pressed the button too soon before. Maybe the doors had to be completely closed before you were supposed to press the button. Maybe that’s what caused all the trouble.

     I’ll tell you. I did more elevator analyzing that day than I’ve done in my life.

     The doors closed and I reached over to press the button. As my index finger approached the number twelve button, I suddenly realized -

     It’s generally wise to press the button of the floor you want to go to.

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